Disclaimer: This post will be far from racism, so I beg you an apologize to mention one of race in this post as an attempt to point out how beautiful it is to be surrounded by the diversity.
Singkawang – West Kalimantan is an island that has various races of population such as; Melayu, Dayak, Madura and Tionghoa. One day, a high school class mate invites me and my friends to her wedding reception. Her (official) husband were also went to the same high school with us but he was in different class with me. Both of them are Tionghoa. This is my very first time attending a Chinese wedding ceremonial and I found some things that make it different with Indonesian typical wedding.
First, is about choosing the right color of envelope. A friend told me, if we want to give them money, we have to use red color. Because red symbolized as blissfulness and luck whereas white one symbolized as misery like death ceremonial. Interesting though. Second, while in the middle of the party, the official couple came to approach their family and friends at the hall to make some pictures. But in local wedding, the couple will approach and gather with their friends after the party ended. Third, is about the songs. In Chinese wedding, the band will playing most of western and Chinese songs. But I think it depends on the taste of the couple. I have been attending some of Indonesian weddings of my friends and my parents’ friends’ children that mostly choosen Indonesian songs and Dangdut to entertain all guests. FYI, Dangdut is one of Indonesian famous genre. As we (Indonesian) know that Dangdut is a-must thing to be played in wedding reception and mostly requested by old people. Usually, the parents have to contribute to sing along with the band to celebrate the happy moment and to entertain the guests. Fourth, guests’ dress. I have noticed that all of my Tionghoa friends are wearing office cloth. I think they’re just want to wear what make them comfortable and simple.
The rest is just the same. Unfortunately, my friends and I have missed an important scene where the couple kissing to each other as a sign that they both are official as husband and wife. But in Islam, the groom only allows to kiss the bride’s forehead in front of the guests, because kissing to each other’s lips in front of the guests is a kind of taboo.
I think it has been more than ten years I have not met these beautiful Amoy (a typical nickname for Tionghoa girls) since I moved. I was very excited because I also catched up with some of my former classmates. A few of them are married and having kids, some are still single just like me. Oh! I remember something. I have noticed something that will take it as a new lesson, that my Chinese friends (especially girls) didn’t apply too much make-up on their face and I realized that some of them didn’t even apply lipstick on their lips. As simple as it is.